Being a SAHM for the past 7 months has taught me not to expect any Thank Yous. You spend every waking moment for someone else. There’s no “me-time”, no time to “do my own things”. You don’t get to make excuses, or say no. When the baby naps you’re rushing to get chores done, eat, shower before she gets up. You’re perpetually exhausted, stretched out and your internal voice is screaming for a day off. But when that chance for a day off comes, your heart feels heavy and you think twice.
You often feel wiped by the evening, counting down to bedtime. Which is another long road of its own. When the baby is finally down for the night, you’d think you finally get some time to yourself. But no, there’s dinner to set, then dishes to wash. There’s cleaning up of the toys and laundry to fold. After all that, you creep into the room to get under the covers. Your back aches the moment you lay down. You want to close your eyes but you haven’t scrolled through instagram today or replied the nine messages. And then before you know it, baby’s up for a feed.
While the rest of the world gets glorious slumber in the night, you’re up nursing or pacifying a crying baby every 2 hours. You get back up before you can fall back asleep proper. Up to four, five times on repeat until the dreaded moment: sunrise.
Really, I’ve come to accept that this job doesn’t come with a lot of acknowledgement. I often feel overwhelmed, under-appreciated, overworked, underpaid (lol, they should really start looking into giving moms some sort of allowance) – as I’m sure all other SAHMs do. I’ve realised that expecting thanks takes up way too much energy and I’m already lacking that on the daily.