Does the word adoption scare you? Maybe you don’t know much about it. Maybe you’ve never thought much about it. Or maybe it’s one of those topics you feel that are too sensitive and so you don’t ask people to share more about it.
For me, adoption had always been something I wanted to do. I was drawn to the idea of providing a home for a child in need and I knew I would love a child the same, biological or not. Something in me – I’m not sure what exactly – felt that it was what I was meant to do. So when the time came, when my husband and I felt ready to expand our family, adoption naturally was the course to take.
One year and 3 failed placements later, Baby A came into our lives. I look at him now and I know I made the right choice. Without a doubt.
You see, just a few years ago I was at the peak of my business career – what started as a small-scale home-based baking venture, Spatula by then had grown into a large sit-in cafe serving waffles, ice-cream, coffee and more. We had live-performances on the weekends and the space was even available to rent for events. It was a huge achievement – but a lot of work. After a few years, I felt somewhat overwhelmed trying to juggle everything – managing the cafe, churning out orders and working out the business aspect of it all. So it was then that we decided it was best for the business, and for myself, to shift the brand’s focus back to our niche – bespoke cakes.
Some may call it an “unfortunate ending”. But to me, it made way for something even better. To me, it was a beginning.
With Spatula scaling back, I finally had the space in my life for a baby. We began our journey in March 2020, right at the cusp of Covid-19. The pandemic presented us with more roadblocks and obstacles than what we probably would have experienced in another time. We faced many ups and downs – highs in receiving the highly-anticipated Placement Phonecall, and lows when these placements fell through and failed, for various reasons.
Through it all, I kept working. I knew that unlike a pregnancy, there wasn’t a fixed timeline to work with. I didn’t have that 9 months to prepare, and I didn’t get to know that in 9 months I’d have my baby. There was a lot of waiting. A lot of hoping. And a lot of disappointment when it didn’t happen. So I told myself to work. I took in orders and fulfilled them from my home kitchen. I worked so that time would fly faster, so I’d be one day closer to bringing my baby home.
Then one day, it happened. Earlier this year we brought Baby A home and everything made sense: why the business had to shrink, why it had to happen during Covid (so my husband would be WFH and could be hands-on with Baby A) and why we had to go through failed placements first (the anticipation meant we had everything ready and prepared for a child and Baby A was the last missing piece to fit in).
Has Baby A’s (sudden) entrance into my life changed me? Somewhat. When you’re pregnant and carrying your baby, and you’re nearing your due date, people start to tell you to “take it easy” and “don’t stress yourself out”. You get to gradually ease your load. For me, I went from being able to churn out cake after cake today to only managing a quarter of the load the next day. Not only that, I now can only work on my bakes when Baby A is napping or down for the night.
It’s been a wild ride. Even though I had always imagined adopting, I never knew how much I could love a little human (who wasn’t even grown in me) as much as I do Baby A, and how much happiness he brings to all our lives. Right now he comes first. Before anything and everything else. Routines are created around his, time is carved out just for him and work is put second to him. He is the centre of our lives and I cannot imagine having our little family any other way – until the next baby, maybe 😉
Photo from Arianna Majeed.
We have been baking and churning out delicious (and aesthetically-pleasing!) halal cakes since 2012. Starting out as a cupcake boutique, we then soon went on to delve into the world of bespoke cakes. Over the last few years, we’ve shifted our focus slightly, and our core business now falls onto decorative artisan cakes for special events like birthdays and weddings. We are more than happy to fill our time with several cake bookings each and every week, and look forward to working with you on yours! Check us out at @spatula.sg
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This article is written as part of everydaymama.co’s Work-At-Home-Mama Series where we feature amazing Mamas who run businesses from their homes.